Jermajestic
Things are, as always, just fine in the Jackson family. For example, Jermaine has a young son, Jermajesty. As in Jermaine + Majesty. Because that’s a name that’s more “majestic” than Michael naming a few of his kids Prince. And Jermajesty’s mother? Why, she’s Alejandra Genevieve Oaziaza, whom we first knew as Randy Jackson’s wife.
Thus: “Hi, my name is Jermajesty Jackson. I’m my own ex-cousin.”
[Update, 2014: Jermajesty’s parents split up and their marriage was nullified because Alejandra had actually already been married to someone else the whole time.]